Saturday, July 18, 2009
I had a grotesque plumbing situation this morning and I'm proud to say that I dealt with it myself. My son constantly clogs our toilets. I'm not sure what happens when he's in there, but I assume it involves a lot of flushing and toilet paper. I should probably monitor his flushing and paper usage, but kids need their privacy. I just wish he'd understand how scary shit water can be when it's fixin' to spill onto your floor.
We have three bathrooms in our house, one on every story. It sucks to have to clean so many, but when you have had stomach bugs, like our house had this past week, they are very, very welcome. I'm not sure what we'll do when my daughter is potty trained and Mr. Rotovirus comes to call again. I guess we'll draw straws for using the Compost Woods.
Apparently the toilet in question was clogged last night, but I somehow didn't hear my son telling me the awesome news. So this morning, he goes and adds more to an overfull reeking pot. When I went into the bathroom, I saw that it could erupt at any moment and make my house its own Bog of Eternal Stench. I was terrified. I don't want to clean a nightmare like that. It had to go down. I'm sure that my evil air conditioner was laughing about this mess. He is especially irate because we weathered a heat wave these past two days without him and I blogged about his cruelty. (You know that he spies on my Internet activity!)
I got a plunger and tried to empower myself. I managed to drop an air freshener spray onto the floor waking my husband who said some beastly things since he's on call this week and has been working all night long. I wasn't going to let crankiness deter me; I had a mission.
I shoved the plunger into the abyss and held my breath while I flushed. I plunged and plunged because my floor depended on it. The raw sewage started to rise almost to the edge, but then miraculously, started going down. All of it gone, leaving a filthy, reeking, but empty bowl in its departure.
I really deserve a medal.
Posted by Jessica at 8:33 AM