Monday, September 7, 2009

Your Weekly Horoscope

*In honor of Labor Day, I am announcing the profession you should have had according to some very complicated star charts of mine.

Capricorn: (Hogwarts Instructor) This combines your need to teach with your fine appreciation of magic.

Aquarius: (Dolphin Trainer) You love the water by nature and can tolerate huge aquatic creatures.

Pisces: (Soda Vending Machine Person) You don't have to deal with annoying people and you have an addiction to caffeine.

Aries: (Franchise Owner) You like to boss get high on power and enjoy bossing around minimum wage people.

Taurus: (Missionary) You can visit far off places and spread your message.

Gemini: (Librarian) You hate people and love books.

Cancer: (Disney Movie Character) You like singing, talking animals, and magic.

Leo: (Reality T.V. Star) You enjoy attention and wouldn't mind loading up on freebies and hosting night club gigs.

Virgo: (Garbage/Recycling Dude) This job would teach you to recycle correctly.

Libra: (Shopping/Lunching Wife) You prefer to spend your days swiping your credit card, taking yoga, and gossiping over lunch cocktails.

Scorpio: (Cattle Rancher) You like the great outdoors and have a secret adventurous side.

Sagittarius: (Professional Sports Player) You love sports and wouldn't mind the money that came from playing them well.


Anonymous said...

HA! Na

Anonymous said...

I'm a Capricorn and would love to teach magic! Can I at least have a wand to beat people with?

Anonymous said...

So NOT me - LOL

Jessica said...

Naomi, just used you a wee bit for this week!

SonyaAnn, why not beat people? That's half the fun of teaching.

Grace, according to the stars, it really IS you...although I'm not sure which horoscope you are.