Capricorn: You will annoy people with your many Facebook status updates.
Aquarius: You will be busy trying to finish work before your deadlines.
Pisces: People will applaud you even when you say cruel things.
Aries: You may have a chance encounter with Charon on the River Styx.
Taurus: Writing has become a big priority for you this week.
Gemini: Mosquitos will ravage your legs.
Cancer: It is an excellent week for picking dandelions.
Leo: You will try and break the rules without getting caught.
Virgo: You are thinking of wearing someone like a scrunchie.
Libra: You will do something even more outrageous than Kanye West.
Scorpio: You will excel in baby wrangling.
Sagittarius: Sleep is your most sought out activity this week.