Free Ride

Another shameful fact about me is that I rode the bus all through high school. I had issues with the stick shift and since it was the only kind of car available to me, I had no other choice. As embarrassing as it must seem to most people, I actually enjoyed it!

The bus stop was a happening place. We played 2 square and kickball. We watched one of the Monkey brothers remove his fake eye. We'd tease the Panek boys about eating sour cream and tortillas for breakfast. It was like an early morning recess and there was always something to do at 8 am.

Once on the bus, we'd immediately head straight for the last seat. My sister, D.D., myself and I would squish into one seat. Sitting in the back meant you had seniority and that you basically owned that bus. It took a few years before we got to that point, but once we were there, we never left.

Our driver, Ms. Ashmore, had this gnarly strip of hair on her wrist that looked very much like a bracelet. She was a tough broad and yelled a lot, but was a decent driver. Sometimes we would have a clueless sub drive the bus. Once this guy was so lost, he decided to drive the wrong way down Hwy 17. It was exhilerating like being in the movie Speed.

There generally was a lot of noise on the bus, kids laughing/singing/dancing/shrieking/fighting. You could yell out curse words and Ms. Ashmore it was you. I once spent 6 months flirting with this BeloRussian exchange student in the seat in front of me and then the next 6 months scowling at his unattractive Tajik replacement.

Things were some bad moments on the bus like when this boy Opie puked out the window and it streaked past the windows. We had vomit on the windows the whole year.

Once the youngest Thorton kid managed to spread lice all over the bus. I had to have my hair washed in gasoline in the backyard to get it all out. Cheaper and more excting than Nix!

I look back on my days on the bus with fondness. My free rides continued into college when I rode the free bus to school and to work. Those experiences are not so wonderful. Public buses seem to be playgrounds for the insane, but I had some pepper spray so that was always my silver lining.